The Value of New Stories

Rest assured, this won’t be a lesson in values-based leadership…I like to leave preaching to my Dad (an ordained Lutheran Minister). The fact is, however, values play a role in the many types of leadership that have been touted by experts. This is not a new concept. It flows hand-in-hand with one of the of the oldest definitions of leadership, “To guide someone or something along a way.”

When I follow someone (be it a guide on a vacation, or a leader at work), I want to know what’s important to that individual. I love adventure and the great unknown AND knowing what someone values allows me insight into why, where, and how s/he might lead. That helps me choose who and when I may trustingly follow.

As I reflect on my own values this holiday season, they become clearer when I get to know myself more deeply. This isn’t always easy because I’ve told myself certain stories for years about who I am. One of these is, “I get things done!” Well, a few years ago I made a purposeful shift from valuing achievement to placing greater importance on relating to others. My new story: “I am empathetic” because having greater compassion is more important to me than getting things done.

Another story I’ve told myself—especially at this gift-giving time of the year—is: “Experiences matter more than material things.” What’s become clearer to me is that I value giving people gifts that are important to them (not me!). My new story: “I give with you in mind” as I highly value the unique qualities and desires of each person in my life.

My leadership journey has me getting more clear on what’s important. Insight into my values allows me to share them more easily with others. This has created more authentic interactions and trust in my relationships. Crystal-clarity is not an end game. Rather it’s a way of seeing through to the real me that means I am more available to, and transparent with, the people in my life.

This Week: What’s important to you? Think about what stories you might need to refresh. Any time is a good time to reflect and re-write, and then share, what you know about your values.

In Next Week’s Post: We dive into the world of intentional choice.