Thanks for the Feedback, by Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen, reminded me that feedback surrounds us 24/7 when we pay attention. Thinking about this took me back to when I hired my first coach. It was the year after my sister died and I decided to make a major career change, moving almost 5,000 miles from home.
As I settled into a high-pressure job for which I was well-suited, I felt a deep disconnect with the life I was living. Type A, heads down, results-orientation wasn’t cutting it. I needed help. I really was looking for someone to give me the answers so I could get back to what I needed to get done. What I got instead was an in-depth exploration of my beliefs, values, and desires. I had to pay attention to how I was showing up at work, at home, and in between.
Feedback came from unexpected sources – joining a Hālau to learn hula, walks on the beach, difficult conversations, the layout of my office … anything and everything enhanced my learning and growth. It wasn’t always easy to accept what I was learning but, in the end, it served me to be open and curious about how others experienced me and how I handled what I was experiencing.
When was the last time you paused long enough to notice what energizes and sustains you? Or actually questioned that what you heard set your triggers off? A conversation instead of a reaction offers, at a minimum, a way to understand; at best, it offers a way to build relationships and alignment.
We all can grow from feedback. After all, Spring is great time for new growth.
This Week’s Challenge: For 24 hours, pay attention to all the feedback you receive. Remember, this doesn’t just have to be spoken since non-verbal cues offer insights too. What have you learned and what will you change?
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